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Son & Father Plays with Penis in Shower


Layed back, divorced, and lonely; father of 9.
easy going, plays well with others..lol
Older male looking for fun sex. If I'm online, I'm ready. Very clean, shower fresh, no disease pleas be the same. I'm very oral and know how to get it done.
White male, good looking, easy going, plays well with others, likes 1 on 1 or group, can be sub or dom
I'm a single father been single for almost 3 years. Looking for something fun and adventurous and I like to chill at home watch movies cuddle and get intimate. Looking for a mutual masturbation club.
We are a married couple that plays together. Very serious n private. We are not for games. Only the serious if u r ready for a good time. Let us know
I am tall I have a big penis
amazing. big penis love sex ,model
I am a male with a rather large penis, and who is sexual crazed.
33 yr old single father of two just got out of a eight yr shitty relationship last spring im ready to go explore and see whats out there. dont mind kids just dont want any more, love foreplay/giving and receiving. i have blonde hair blue eyes im 5'11" and i am a slim build
I am a guy who wants and needs a Shemale to have sex with me or a super good looking guy with a beautiful penis while inebriated
less solid,tall,blue ayes.20cm penis
Straight but curious and extremely shy and bashful and self conscious about uncut and small penis
I love women. Men, I just like to be friends and only enjoy giving and receiving oral sex, only on penis.
I'm 5'4 I love to have fun, cook, write plays and dance. I am a server at a restaurant and part time cook as well.
Relaxed, work oriented. In a secure and loving relationship. We like to hike and travel as well as enjoy our time together. we go to movies and plays, spend time doing crafts or just snuggling.
I'm young very horney who found out I want a man I swerw I got to try it id rather have small penis very open mind this ass only has had fingers in it I really love to send pics


A mother, father and young son are visiting the circus. The elephants walk out into the circus ring and the little boy says to his mother, "What's that?"

"That's the elephant's tail," she replies.

"No, under the tail," says the youngster. The mother is clearly embarrassed and says, "Oh, nothing."

The boy turns to his father and repeats the same question. His father looks and says, "That's the elephant's penis, son."

"So, why did mum say it was nothing?" asks the boy.

The father draws himself up to his full height and says, "Son, I've spoiled that woman."
The young man sat with his father and explained to him " Dad you dont understand Im worried about my wedding night. I have never been with a woman before. What do I do?"
His father replied "Dont worry son, just make sure your honeymoon suite has an adjoining room, then if you have any problems I will whisper through the door."
After the couple got into the room, the groom explained he was going to take a shower and freshen up. The bride realized she had to take a hellatious shit. She didnt want to go in the bathroom because that stink up the bathroom and would be embarrasing. So she finds a shoebox and takes a shit in it and puts the lid on it. Then she sets it on the floor and figures she will throw it away the next morning. After the groom comes out of the shower all he sees is his new wife laying on the bed naked. Excitedly he rushes into the bedroom and wouldnt you know it he steps right in the box of shit and yells " Oh my God theres shit in the box!!!" His father opens the door and yells "Turn her over son, turn her over!"
If I had a penis I'd wear it outside
In cafes and car lots with pomp and with pride
If I had a penis I'd pamper it proper
I'd stay in the tub and use me as a stopper
If I had a penis I'd take it to parties
Stretch it and stroke it and shove it at smarties
I'd take it to pet shows and teach it to stay
I'd stuff it in turkeys on thanksgiving day
I'd rival my buddies in sportscars and stick-shifts
I'd shower my spire with girlies and gifts
I'd peek around corners
I'd aim at my toilet
I'd poke it at foreigners
And soap it and oil it
If I had a penis I'd run to my mother
Comb out the hair and compare it to brother
I'd lance her, I'd knight her, my hands would indulge
Pants would seem tighter and buckle and bulge

A penis to plunder, a penis to push
Cause one in the hand is worth one in the bush
A penis to love me, a penis to share...
To pick up and play with when nobody's there

I'd sit like a guy, I'd straddle the chair
I'd play with my fly, albeit with care
I'd dip it in chocolate, I'd stick it in sockets
Go to the movies with hands deep in pockets
I'd stick it in vacuums on vacant verandas
Gas-guzzling bottles and poodles and pandas
And puddles and drain pipes and doggies and ditches,
Pool halls and potholes and bottles and bitches...

If I had a penis, I'd climb every mountain
I'd force it on females
I'd pee like a fountain...

If I had a penis I'd still be a girl,
But I'd make much more money and conquer the world.
Good Lawyer vs. Bad Lawyer
What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.

~ ~ ~ ~

Lawyer's Son
The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's footsteps, so he went to law school. He graduated with honors, and then went home to join his father's firm. At the end of his first day at work he rushed into his father's office, and said, "Father, father, in one day I broke the accident case that you've been working on for ten years!" His father responded: "You idiot, we could live on the funding of that case for another ten years!"

Be Happy
D i c k

They say that the new super computer knows everything. A skeptical man came and asked the computer, "Where is my father?"

The computer bleeped for a short while, and then came back with "Your father is fishing in Colorado."

The skeptical man said triumphantly, "You see? I knew this was nonsense. My father has been dead for twenty years."

"No", replied the super computer immediately. "Your mother's husband has been dead for twenty years. Your father just landed a three pound trout."

Be Happy
D i c k
While cleaning little Billy's room, his mother found several S&M magazines under his mattress. In shock, she called for his father to see what she had found. She said " Look at all these dirty magazines." As his father flipped through the S&M magazines, the mother was pacing with her head in her hands. She said "What should we do about this?" The father raising his eyes from the S&M magazines replied " For God's sakes, Dont Spank Him!"
Just logged on & heard about your mis-hap. Noticed U were missing from chat for a bit. Hope all is going well for U. I know it's not funny at the time it happens & all the pain associated. If it makes U feel any better, I once too slipped in the shower, grabbed the shower curtain on the way down, landed on the bathroom floor with a resounding thud. Wife walks in and I'm wearing the shower curtain in the horizontal position. She says, "You OK?".
ya! Take care of yourself!
AJAXXX missed the point. No one is saying don't put up penis pictures, they are saying please show us more than just that. I will let you men in on a little secret, the penis is really not that important! I want to see the whole package, as do most women I really hate it when I get a message from a guy, and he attaches 20 pictures of his penis! One is not enough? You're chances of meeting women or couples will greatly improve if you show us more than just your penis. For me, it's a real turn off as that tells me the man in question is only thinking of one thing.

I understand fully about not wanting to show your face, not everyone is comfortable doing that. You can still show full body pictures with your face blurred out, and make a note in your profile about how you will exchange proper pictures on request.
I've tried Magic Shave, Veet, Nair, simple razors, turbo razors, and waxing... I've shaved in the shower, after the shower, before the shower, and been shaved by a partner...

The best overall method out of all of them is Veet. It's no longer sold at Wal-mart, so go to Target.

If you're shaving, use conditioner or Coochie Cream (which is just like conditioner and is available at your local novelty store). Don't be afraid to contort yourself to weird positions or pull the skin tight.
Sorry Robert, but we must disagree with your entire post. Your analogy about your grandfather just doesn't work in this day. We do look at much more then just the pussy and the dick, we look at the package surrounding everything. Sure, 50 years ago, your Grandfather may have said "All Women look the same when you stand em on their heads." But that was a really sexist attitude that doesn't hold true today. Most of us are looking for more that just the genitals, as we realize the genitals are such a small part of real sex. The person is the most important part of sex. Everything else is secondary.

Yes, to the man, how we treat the penis is quite important, and most women understand that. But to the woman, it really is not the "end all and be all" of sex. It's just part of it.

I will say that I have been with many men, both big and small. My sexual satisfaction has never had anything to do with penis size. That is some sort of myth that men seem to propagate. I really don't care about the size of a man's penis, and most of the women I know in the Lifestyle don't either. It;s the attitude of the man that gets me off, the way he makes love to me, not the size of his dick. size is really the least of my concerns. I truly feel sorry for any woman that thinks otherwise, as they are missing out on some real fun.

Yes Robert, we women understand that your penis is important to you. It's just not all that important to us! You guys need to understand that. We prefer the package the penis is wrapped in that the penis itself

Carol xoxoxo
Actually, there is a surgical procedure that will make your penis an inch longer on average. It has to do with cutting the ligament that supports your penis. It's become a fairly common cosmetic surgery for men.
This fellow comes to confession. "Father," he said, "forgive me for I have sinned."
The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?"
"I lusted," the fellow replied.
"Tell me about it,"
The fellow then related his story. "Father, I am a deliveryman for UPS. Yesterday I was making
a delivery in the affluent section of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened and there
stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She had long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds.
She was dressed in a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked if I would
like to come in."
"And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest.
"Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how I lusted," replied the man.
"Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will get your reward in heaven, my son."
"A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?" the fellow asked.
The priest replied, "I think a bale of hay would be appropriate, you jackass."
Wow - it was exciting reading this. I have have engaged in piss play several times in the sea, a few times in the shower and once for real out of the shower with a girl squatting over my chest and face. I loved it. Have not found anyone interested since. I would love to rim while getting a GS.
Being uncut here are some of the things I do. I am very concious of my hygiene and do my best to not offend. I skin back my foreskin while in the shower when I first get in the shower and really soap that hooter up good. Then I go about the shower as usual. Before I get out I repeat the first step. Then, no laughs please or lame jokes about "blow jobs" , I take my blow dryer and on the low setting I skin it back again, and dry all exposed areas. You cant really just dry it with a towel. The foreskin automatically covers your cockhead when you wash and if you leave the inside of the foreskin wet this can speed up the process of becoming yucky. See if this helps.
OK I found the answer. heres prolly more than you wanted to know...hehe
Erect Length Measuring:
Erect length is what anyone is interested in. And it is best to measure from the side of the penis. This method is the standardized and used by researchers to measure the "average penis size" which is incidentally between 6" - 6.5" erect length. First of all make sure you have a 100% erection where you would consider your penis the "most erect". While holding your penis below the head and place the ruler next to it with your other hand. The ruler must be slightly pressing against your pubic bone. Measure to the nearest millimeter and be sure that you do not EXAGGERATE the measurement. It is recommended that you under exaggerate, because exaggeration on the measurement could result a lack of motivation in the future.

Flaccid Length Measuring:
Flaccid length of the penis is dictated by many factors, including the ambient temperature. This might mean that you have contradicting results depending on the temperature of the situation that you are in currently. In order to keep results accurate we provide a standardized way for measuring the flaccid penis. Flaccid gains are the first gains coming with penis enlargement program. You should stand up straight and extend your flaccid penis in front of you (it is really important NOT to stretch it), your penis should now be parallel with the floor. Now, place the ruler next to your penis so it is slightly pressing against the pubic bone. The ruler and your penis should be parallel with each other (as shown in the video).

Flaccid Girth Measuring:
The girth is extremely awkward to measure cause many people have different measurements of girth size, depending on which part of the penis they actually measure. The standardized way is to measure in the centre of the penis shaft. While flaccid, hold your penis out in front of you and then, wrap a tape measure around. You do not have to pull the tape measure too hard, pull it to a reasonable level and try to remember this LEVEL of pulling for the next time. Average flaccid length of girth is about 3"-4". On our photographs the model has really large flaccid length and girth and it is most likely that yours will be smaller.

Erect Girth Measuring:
Firstly, make sure your penis is 100% erect and then go on measuring. Now, hold your penis out in front of you so it is parallel with the floor. With your other hand place the tape measure around the penis making sure not to pull too much tight. The average erect girth is 5" - 5.5" according to the most recent surveys.
I like smoggytomcat's multi person orgy... one of my personal fantasies is... heading home from the gym with a friend to cool down at his house... a shower to get clean, but before I can towel off he joins in on the shower... washing each other off... then heading off for some sex ... of course this is all based on the idea that I did not no I was interested, at least not until he shows me....


Age Play
I'm in Utah and would love to find an older guy to have some fun father/daughter role playing with.
Sex With Guy And His Dad
i would love to voyeur a father and son blowing each other or a bareback fuck and possibly participate
Forced Bi
first experience several years ago in public shower at local pool complex admired guy big cock he asked me if i liked it said yes he told me to go to the private shower room and leave door open i did he soon followed forced me yo my knees and made me give him a blow job my first came in my mouth and face he invited me to his place i went and really enjoyed him using me for his pleasure he took picture with cell phone he told me he had friends who would like an inexpierenced older guy to use and asked if i would be willing only stipulation i was blindfolded so they wouldnt be known i am sure he was pimping me but the action was great only for a short time
Cock Rings
My basic understanding of a cock ring is that it is supposed to help keep the penis erect while have sex. Is that correct? Are there some that are better than others at doing that?
Men On A Leash
I definately have a fantasy of being a sex slave for a couple who would keep me on a penis leash and use me for themselves and their friends pleasure!
We love fucking bareback!! We love the feel of a bare naked penis and vagina caressing each other as it slides in and out! We also love the feel of a bare naked penis and a rectum caressing each other while it slides in and out. She loves to feel his hot semen shooting up against her cervix as they have simultaneous orgasms. Then she loves to feel more semen filling her as more men fuck her. He loves to feel that hot cum shooting deep inside his ass. Then he loves to feel more cum shooting inside him as more men fuck him bareback. We want guys to come and give us your semen.
Golden Showers
I've never been involved in a golden shower, but I'd love to both give and receive from both a man and a woman.
Shared Showers
Oh now this is something I like..sharing a shower with someone and lathering up my breasts and washing them with them alllll over...very very sexy and sensuous!
Fuck My Ass
I love being fucked in the ass. I am sure the wonderful feeling of that penis sliding in and out of me has to be very much like it is for my partner when it slides in and out of her vagina. Then feeling his hot cum shooting inside me is marvelous.
Erotic Massages
Practice makes perfect. If by chance You are interrupted by the urgent need for a little nookie, or hot passionate love or maybe a little 'snack' (if Ya know what I mean) just pick up where you left off or better yet, go take a shower together & start all over...........

Be Happy
Piss Play
I'm a bi, mwm who loves giving and receiving golden showers...I'll be in FL in 2 weeks, so if you're in the area, please let me know. I'd also like to hear from
all you golden shower lovers in MI.
Cum In My Ass
I have had guys fuck me bareback and cum in my ass, and I love it. It is a wonderful feeling when he shoots his semen deep inside me. I would love to be gangbanged by a group of guys, all shooting a big load inside me. Each time the next man slides his penis into my ass it pushes some cum out.
I am in Erie Pennsylvania off Interstate 90 and Interstate 79 and if you are a business man that needs a place to shower, watch TV, Eat and have some great sex with me while passing through just let me know. Read my profile here please then contact me. REAL MEET ONLY ...I AM (NOT) INTERESTED IN ANY TYPE OF CYBER!

Fingering is a beautiful feeling. Weather it's fingering yourself, being fingered or fingering someone else. I used to do it in the shower when I was in the navy.
I am in Erie Pennsylvania off Interstate 90 and Interstate 79 and if you are a truck driver that needs a place to shower, watch TV, Eat and have some great sex with me while passing through just let me know. Read my profile here please then contact me. REAL MEET ONLY ...I AM (NOT) INTERESTED IN ANY TYPE OF CYBER!

I am in Erie Pennsylvania off Interstate 90 and Interstate 79 and if you are a truck driver that needs a place to shower, watch TV, Eat and have some great sex with me while passing through just let me know. Read my profile here please then contact me. REAL MEET ONLY ...I AM (NOT) INTERESTED IN ANY TYPE OF CYBER!

Truck Stops
I am in Erie Pennsylvania off Interstate 90 and Interstate 79 and if you are a truck driver that needs a place to shower, watch TV, Eat and have some great sex with me while passing through just let me know. Read my profile here please then contact me. REAL MEET ONLY ...I AM (NOT) INTERESTED IN ANY TYPE OF CYBER!


Hi again Bill and Pattie, thanks for your last note. I hope that our referrals evolve to the paid status soon... And we've seen a few that we suspect will end up there sooner rather than later. On perusal, it doesn't look like we refer a lot of straight peoples at all - I suppose that's one of the many benefits of living in the light - even when we cross the line into the the community. If half those guys didn't burn so many calories pretending they're straight, swing clubs would be a lot more fun. Anyway, I digress... But I simply dig the stats that you collect on site activity - you're really in tune with what's happening here. So, I've agonized over writing this testimonial, and it dawned on me in the shower this morning why - the one thing that we really have some huge kudos to lavish upon you for.... Is not necessarily the affiliate program.... It's the external profile link. You have got to know how unique that is in this market. My gosh... I don't have to code it, I don't have to host it, the interface to get it there doesn't insult my intelligence, but even the garden-variety WebTV loser can get through it. And once I've filled out my profile, I don't have to insult (spam) people to share it with them. There's nothing more obnoxious than clicking someone's profile link and meeting face-to-face with a gimme-your-credit-card-login-page. I guess that's what the evil empire gave us that big x up there on the right for. You guys rock. And saving us all, those useless hours answering the same set of stupid questions from people that share no interests with us - may get you eligible for sainthood (if you believe in that sort of thing*) so without further adieu... Here's the little blurb that ties the two concepts together... We're pleasantly surprised to keep finding one awesome feature after another. We thought that our favorite benefit to even our 'free' membership was the external profile link. Anyone we give the link to can view the basics of our profile - on the first click - no strings, no hassles. That shows a lot of class on Bisexual Playground's part because it's a true dedication to making a contribution to the lifestyle community. But guess what? Visitors to our profile want one of their own, and they join the site anyway. And we earn points for all those new members that we can use to upgrade to paid status. Wow. We put the link in our AOL profile as an experiment, and 3 weeks later, we're close to having earned enough points for a 6-month paid membership. Quite simply - the affiliate program works, and everyone benefits. Thanks! Anything I've written above is fair game to tie to our id in your efforts to improve and build this great website. Our very best regards, devon and Scott

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