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Join To View peeteerr	A Jewish Santa Claus came down the chimney and said: "Anyone want to buy a present?" Hear about Santa and his reindeer landing on top of an outhouse? Santa looked around for a moment, then hollered "No no, Rudolph! I said the SCHMIDT house!" I hope Santa brings me that mistletoe belt I asked for! I think that Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. No one in the history of the world has ever purchased a fruitcake for themselves. No parent in their right mind would give a 6-year-old a drum set, therefore Santa exists!! The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus. Q: Do you know why Santa dosen't have any children ??? A: he only comes once a year and thats down a chimney ... Why is Santa Claus always so happy? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic. Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite. When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas. Hug:) Hug Send Mail IM
Join To View peeteerr	A Jewish Santa Claus came down the chimney and said: "Anyone want to buy a present?" Hear about Santa and his reindeer landing on top of an outhouse? Santa looked around for a moment, then hollered "No no, Rudolph! I said the SCHMIDT house!" I hope Santa brings me that mistletoe belt I asked for! I think that Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. No one in the history of the world has ever purchased a fruitcake for themselves. No parent in their right mind would give a 6-year-old a drum set, therefore Santa exists!! The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn't believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus. Q: Do you know why Santa dosen't have any children ??? A: he only comes once a year and thats down a chimney ... Why is Santa Claus always so happy? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic. Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite. When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas. Merry Christmas . Send Mail IM
Lionessa	Christmas Groaners What do they call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses. What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace? Krisp Kringle. Which of Santa's reindeer needs to mind his manners the most? "Rude"olph.< br /> Where do Santa's reindeer like to stop for lunch? Deery Queen. What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a chimney? Santa Claus-trophbia. What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish. What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer. How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas? Fleece Navidad. What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper? Ribbonhood. Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem. How do canines in Mexico say Merry Christmas? Fleas Navidog Send Mail IM
Cboyvers	Why Miss Delilah did I hear you saying something about whacking with an artificial Santa Clause? And was this happening on a front lawn? In the middle of the night? With a one of those big official baton type flashlights? All rolling on the frosty lawn, surrounded by bushes whacking Santa, whacking Santa, whacking Santa! I'd be showing the bump off at parties as a trophy but you could try bangs or a front flip. Sort of Veronica Lake, Lauren Bacall. Rolling and whacking in the moonlight with Jolly fake Nick,, Santa's little helper indeed!Well I never did hear or see the likes of this before. I think I like you even more than I already did! Miss Delilah! Keep it up! Cboy Send Mail IM
jigsawjake	Santa comes down the chimney to nice cosy living room, Christmas Carols playing softly and the tree all nicely decorated, but what caught his eye was the beautiful woman standing there in a long robe. The Woman says "OH Santa I am so glad you are here, I only want one thing this year and it is for you to make love to me!" Santa is stunned for a moment and he says "HO HO HO, I've got to go, I have to deliver the toys to the children you know." Woman taking off her robe to reveal a very sexy outfit says "OH PLEASE Santa I havn't had sex for so long, please make love to me." Santa stamers " hhhHO hhHO hhhHO, I've got to, got to go I have to deliver the toys to the children you know." The woman completely strips naked and starts running her sexy body all over him and says ' OH Santa, I will do anything you want, I will be as good - or as BAD as you want me to be, just stay and have sex with me !!!" Santa's eyes bugged out and sweat was rolling off his brow when he said "Hey Hey Hey, I guess I'll have to stay, Santa can't get up the chimney with his dick this way!!!" Happy Holidays and may all your dreams and wishes come trueHugKissKiss Send Mail IM
Delilah	Very true.....ever hear Santa pull over and ask for directions? Yup, Santa is a woman! Send Mail IM

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