chefboyardee
Hi, I am sorry if this issue is a downer for anyone, but I wanted to get your thoughts on it if you're willing as it is something I am struggling with. My situation: I love and respect my wife and I am grateful she is ok with my bra and panty wearing ways. Lots of guys are not so lucky. She did say, however, that she is not okay with me having sex with others. I don't know what her specific objections are. I didn't;t ask her at the time. I thought then that I would be able to live within her boundaries. And so far I have, but I am weakening, especially since joining this site. Our sex life is close to non-existent. She doesn't; have any interest in sex and, for reasons I understand she doesn't want anything from me in the way or oral or manual pleasure. She just doesn't;t have any sex drive. (In the past she was sometimes frisky when she had too much to drink, but that was a turn off for me.) The extent of our sex life now is that once every week or so she tries to help me masturbate. She'll suck my dick for maybe two or three minutes and then it's up to me. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, whereas I can usually come while looking at porn. I know that I have no right to expect her to have more interest in sex than she does, but I can't help feeling that it's unfair of her to look elsewhere for what she can't or won;t give me. So I have three choices: 1. Live with it. 2. Sneak around and lie. Or 3. Talk to her and try to get her to change her mind. Three might seem to be the obvious and mature choice, but it would be one uncomfortable conversation with the likely result being anger and resentment lasting for a long time. From a utilitarian point of view, assuming I never got caught, the least painful choice would be two, sneaking around and lying, where the only negatives are the guilt and the risk of being found out. Perhaps the 4th option is to stick with video sex, which she might not be as opposed to as physical sex. But it's not what I want. Anyway, longe enough. Any thoughts? Thanks.

26486
I get it on down the road so to speak

Strtcur30
Don’t cheat, it’s not worth all the negatives that come with it. Communication is key in a relationship, I would at least start to have some sort of more in depth talk about your needs and see where it goes

chefboyardee
Thanks for the reply. I think you are right and I need to have the conversation again. Trying not to rock the boat, but that's not always a good solution.

yourcockinmymouth
Coming from a woman first how old is your wife because it could be hormonal, second perhaps the fact that you wear bras and panties is a turn off for her. Third have you tried to make her feel special did something for her that she would never have expected from you? You mentioned her being a bit tipsy bothered you so maybe something you do is a turn off for her. You both need to communicate and figure it out and turn that couple minutes of sucking your cock into hours of sucking and fucking it's worth a try luck